Friday, October 15, 2010

Friday's Music Moment - Ball and Chain by Social Distortion

I have a friend whose confidence in her marriage astounds me. "We will never get divorced, never ever, nope, not a topic for discussion," she tells me. 

Me, I don't take a single day of my marriage for granted, because the whole thing seems so unlikely. Guess that's drilled into you when you go for the pre-marriage counseling with the priest who worries aloud,  "You two seem so different, I'm going to ask you to take the Myers-Briggs test." When our results came back she clucked and said, "WOW. I've never seen scores so far apart." When you hear "they said it wouldn't last," it's a little disturbing when "they" includes the person who joined you in holy matrimony.

And yet, this weekend we're celebrating our eighteenth anniversary, and Andrew is still the guy my eye goes to first in any crowded room.

It probably helps that we share the same gallows humor. If one of us makes mention of the length of time we've been together, the other one usually says, "That seems long enough. We should probably quit while we're ahead."  When Andrew really cheeses me off, I've been known to start sentences, "When I find my NEXT husband, he'll never…"

When we first started dating and I'd go over to Andrew's apartment to meet him, his roommate Joe - later the best man at our wedding - used to put this song on the stereo to herald my arrival. I didn't mind. If first love feels like a Taylor Swift-described romance, going the distance is more like hardcore punk, as tough as Social D lead singer Mike Ness' tattoos and eyeliner and his leather vest. In fact maybe the band's third album should be required listening for the newly engaged.

Who knows if we'll make it to our nineteenth anniversary, so we have some big fun planned this weekend. And here's to still being the little wife of my favorite ball and chain. 


  1. Ahh...the little woman, strong enough to hoist said ball and chain and threateningly swirl it around husband's head to keep him in check if need be.

  2. WORD.

    & both do this marriage thing proud.

  3. Based on your tweet, I had to click through to determine what song you'd chosen.
    My initial thoughts:
    Time Bomb (Rancid)
    The Kids Aren't Alright (Offspring)
    Long View (Green Day)
    Bad Reputation (Joan Jett - from your earlier days perhaps)
    Real Wild Child (Iggy)

    Just glad it wasn't Pretty Vacant (Sex Pistols), I'm Against It (Ramones) or Unsatisfied (Replacements)

  4. Every single one of those, and also "I Wanna Be Sedated" by the Ramones, has in fact been appropriate at some point or the other during the 18 years.

  5. You do us married folk proud! Happy Anniversary
    Lisa Lamoureux

  6. I've been married way longer than you. Once a new acquaintance asked me how long I'd been married and when I told him he said, "Is is true love or do you lack imagination?"
    BTW - Love the song you chose - it's on one of the playlists I paint with.

  7. Readers, tell me if you really think that the sumptuous, quiet still life paintings at could be made while listening to Social D. I would have guessed Bach, myself.

    And Julia - your friend would be cynical if he wasn't so funny!

  8. My toast to my husband on our 20th anniversary: "Here's to 17 great years!"

    It's part of the family folklore now. Whatever we have--true love or a lack of imagination-- we're still keepin' it real at 37 years.

  9. My wife and I generally exchange a phrase we initiated with sincerity after the 1st few years- "Wow (insert time together), you're my longest relationship so far!" 14 years Baby!


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