Normal? Malarkey.

Welcome to the new and improved blog. But first, I have a confession to make: I have no schtick.

I grew up in a middle class family in Upstate New York with parents who are still married and two siblings, and we all still talk to each other. I've been happily married to the same guy since '92, and our two daughters fill us with soul-restoring grace when they are not causing us to pull out our hair. My dog is too spunky by about 50%, I worry about the bills, I look forward to cocktail hour, I could stand to lose five pounds. I believe we're put on earth to help take care of each other and it, but if you've got a good piece of chisme for me, I'm all ears.

In short, there's no crazy dysfunction that would make you want to stop and look at my train wreck, just the normal mix of motivations and opinions that define a standard-issue human.

On the other hand, I'm well aware that my normal may well equal your strange. You say you don't still vacation at the summer camp where you attended as a child and actually look forward to square dances and bug juice? You haven't baked cookies for a musician you love, figuring it was more dignified that throwing panties at the stage? You don't sometimes drop '80s hip-hop lyrics into casual conversation, just to see if the other person is listening?

Oh. Really? None of you? Awkward for me, then.

Guess it just proves my point, that the idea of a single definition of "normal" is just malarkey. Cell phone use in a symphony hall, pitching coaches for 8 year olds, someone getting laid off with no severance after 17 years with his employer…the new normal is the old nutty, to me. Thank goodness for friends who react by saying, "Are you and I the only ones who aren't crazy?"

With this blog I'm hoping to make that circle of friends a bit bigger and, let's face it, test my theory that there are still people out there with both common sense AND a sense of the absurd. I'll write about what makes me cringe, what makes me laugh, and what makes me cry (a lot, thanks to motherhood, the Olympics, and Band of Brothers - full of Malarkey.)

I figure if half of you are laughing WITH me and the other half AT me, we're all still laughing. I look forward to finding out which side you're on.